Friday, January 30, 2009

Love Song for Noone - John Mayer

Staying home alone on a friday
Flat on the floor looking back
On old love
Or lack thereof
After all the crushes are faded
And all my wishful thinking was wrong
Im jaded
I hate it

Im tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
So tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here

Searching all my days just to find you
Im not sure who Im looking for
Ill know it
When I see you
Until then, Ill hide in my bedroom
Staying up all night just to write
A love song for no one

Im tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
So tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here

I could have met you in a sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
Could I have missed my chance
And watched you walk away?

I could have met you in a sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
Could I have missed my chance
And watched you walk away?

Im tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
So tired of being alone
So hurry up and get here
Youll be so good
Youll be so good for me

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

A Long Walk Down Memory Lane.

On a whim, I checked out my rather-inactive Friendster account then looked through the past (more like ancient) testimonials, you know the days when people actually took the time and effort to write nice stuff about you ? Now, the whole "testimonial" thing has been supplemented by the "comment" system where messages can range from long replies to the quintessential "How are you?!" to the meaningless and very brief "haha". I kind of miss the old days. And feeling nostalgic, I began missing people. A lot of people. From childhood friends to current friends I barely see. So here's shoutouts that'll never be seen...haha.

Marianne and Kaye: I miss sneaking out after lunch to play at your houses when I'm supposed to be having siesta. I miss playing dolls, baking our mud cakes, piko, patintero, chinese garter, habulan, jackstone, cycling, rollerblading, dancing, celebrating our birthdays with big parties, basketball, duyan sa mangahan, going to pulo, eating fishballs taho and halo halo. Grabe, I miss you guys talaga. I want to be 6 years old again.

The guys in BF: They were mostly my older friends so I looked up to them. I miss watching them play basketball. And they were a funny bunch. Kuya Marco, who I had a crush on, was really nice to me. Haha. I miss Joker Kuya Potch, Perverted Max, Cool Kuya Marvin, the Buckingham boys. I also miss Tito Julie and his huge lizard pet! Fishball Man! Tito Dennis! BFG Jabar!

BF Resort Village was the best place to be a kid. I especially miss going to the country club to swim and eat their memorable Spaghetti with Garlic Bread. I miss climbing the watertank hide in the roof while stealing the neighbour's mangoes.

Sa Project 8 naman, I miss Kuya Yeyed and Pongpong! Jolens (marbles) was the coolest game! And I remember how we used to go to the deserted carpack upstairs and play all kinds of games! I miss going to the neighbours house to watch Sineskwela! =)

I never thought it'd happen but Cebu City became my 2nd home. I miss the delicious BBQ food, the lechon and the beaches.

Diane: Now that you're in US, I miss you even more! Totally BFF. I wish my parents had allowed me to hang out more at your house! And I miss Tita and Tito and Aycee. I just want to teleport to US, give them a huge hug and spend the whole night catching up.

Micah: I've totally lost contact with you but I hope someday, we'll see each other again!
Michael: Best seatmate ever! Brilliant in drawing and super fun to talk to. Miss you na talaga.
Les Paul: Another Best Friend. Swimming Buddy. Lunch Buddy (That lucky bastard always had Jollibee then we'll trade). I really really really miss him.
Prime: My rival in school! Haha. It was fun competiting with him!
Hilton: He was really really nice to me. Haha. I think it's because he had a crush on me. Then again he's had a crush on probably all the girls in class. Playboy talaga.
Camille: Brilliant Singer, sweetest friend. Nakakamiss. I wonder where you are.
JD: You may be a chick magnet now but I'll always remember you as the rather effeminate chubby talkative guy who was my bestfriend in Grade 2.

My Carpool Gang! Chris, Rey, Vanessa, Diane, Aycee. Bus rides have never been this fun.
My neighbours! Monica! Lara! Edward (Jingjing- heehaw!), Jackie. I miss all those games we played, the adventures 'down the hill', playing with spiders, cycling exhibitions, getting fries from the nearby resto and sharing it because it was the only thing we could afford, and celebrating birthdays, playing with Magic the Gathering Cards.

I've left out a lot of people, like my teachers (who were the coolest and most memorable).
And that's only my Manila and Cebu Days.

That's why I sometimes hate moving, because you get to know a lot of people and become close to them, then you're parents utter the dreaded words "We're moving to..." and you're forced to say awful goodbyes and not be there to grow up with them. You begin to lead different lives, be different people, know less and less about them until...they become vague memories (Thank God I have a pretty good memory when it comes to these).

I WANT A HUGEASS REUNION.







Tuesday, January 27, 2009

I really really really...

...don't want to go to school tomorrow. 202,208, and History. My top 3 least favorite modules.
...don't want gain weight. But I am damn it!
...want to drop my History module. It might be interesting but the readings are torture. Historians like to write in a pompous academic language.
...want to figure out what I really want.
...need to lose weigh. My gain in mass is quite disgusting.
...need to finish 208 Assignment.


On a random and rather embarrassing note, last night I dreamt that I had a baby, and I was cooing and cradling her/him so lovingly.
I was saying motherly things like " Give mommy a kiss."
And that cute thing gave me a kiss damn it!
All this after I finished reading Breaking Dawn.
That dream scared the crap out of me.
No. No. No.
My motherly instincts are NOT creeping up in my subconscious.
It's the books fault and my hyper imagination.
Now I dread turning 20 even more.




Monday, January 26, 2009

Yet Another Earworm

I just wanna scream and lose control
Throw my hands up and let it go
Forget about everything and run away

I just want to fall and lose myself
Laughing so hard it hurts like hell
Forget about everything and run away


-Runaway, Avril Lavigne.


Sunday, January 25, 2009

At this point in my life...

Faith is an expectation I cannot live up to.

Sleep Laughing

My Aunt said I was laughing in my sleep last night.

I don't sleep-talk or sleep-walk but instead sleep-laugh.

Amusing.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Why?

Knowing that death is inevitable, why do we live as if we have eternity on earth?

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Thursday Thoughts.

I think my timetable is such that, for 3 days, I'm drained of my brain power, sanity and happiness. Thus, I see Thursdays as the light at the end of the tunnel. I refuse to do anything on this day. I declare it a sacred day; my Me-time.


Satisfied my sushi cravings today. Bitched about life over a bottle of sake with Nat. I ended up finishing the whole bottle since someone had special orange juice with them. I was quite tipsy. It was only the afternoon. Happy Hour has not even started yet. I just died on the bed when I got home but I woke up feeling significantly less moody, and dare I say optimistic?


Things to do:
1. 202: own notes, discussion board postings,decide topic for assignment
2. 205: own notes, stupid Aesop's fable, individual speech research and outline, speech analysis
3. 208: own notes, critique 3 journals
4. 223: own notes
5. GV11: own notes, choose graphic design, analysis, CA1 presentation
6. HH202: readings till Wk 4, summaries, debate materials


GOAL: Finish everything by Thursday Next Week. 28th January. :)


I'm looking forward to next weekend! Flea Market! BBQ with Sushi family!Meet Chloe and see baby Sarah (finally)!


Time to draw up *The Plan*.


First month of the semester always gets me down. But I'll get over it.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Monday is gonna be the death of me.

Now that I know what it's like to have an almost 9am-9pm day, I need to strategize if I am to survive.
Seriously.

208. Ethics. Makes my head spin. Why can't things be simply black and white? But who gets to define what's black or what's white? Standards of definition mushes the two colors together and thus we get the ambivalent gray. No wonder there is still an open philosophical debate about Absolute Truth - a debate I cannot engage in as of the moment.

205. I said I wanted to become the President of the Philippines. The hilarity of it all. How do you appear sincere and convincing when your bladder demands attention?

GV 11. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. We create our own meanings, so I guess in that sense we'll never know reality as it is because we look through the lenses of our own interpretations.
We analyzed the poster below in class today. The 'proper interpretation' of it would be:

  • Godzilla represents Japan while King Kong, USA
  • It signifies peace between the two nations where they look beyond the atrocities of WW2 (Especially the bombing of Hiroshima). So the two characters, hold hands together (cooperation) and walk towards a better future (into the sunrise)
But I saw it all too differently. The fact that they were represented by such characters implied that both countries were monsters (at that time). And instead of the caption PEACE, Ginger and I morbidly thought it better as "Together, we can do more damage" *Check out their calculated grins.*






I'm scared that I'm getting a pseudo-education: a student of breadth with not much depth.
Now that I've acknowledged it, I feel obliged to work on it. This I owe to myself.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Eto Nanaman.

Something does not feel quite right. Now if I can only figure out what it is.

Why can't my thoughts flow like elegant prose instead of the usual erratic, meandering and incoherent pop ups?

What is it with me and my inability to focus? It's frustrating.

Inis na Inis.
Wala namang rason mainis.
Gusto ko lang umiyak.