Catharsis

I seriously don't feel like doing any schoolwork at all. Which is the opposite of what I should be feeling because the amount of work is piling up. I'm just so irritated, so frustrated, so sick of deadlines and the work that goes with it. Even though I'm usually easily distracted, this time, I'm actively looking for distractions.

I suddenly hate courses with continuous assessment AND exams. The way I see it, I feel the same amount of stress studying for an exam worth 80% and another worth 30% to 50%. Except, for the ones with exams worth only less than 50%, there are assignments/assessments worth 15% which add extra stress throughout the semester. At least if it's only based on the exam, then I can pace myself better without having to worry this week's horrible assignment to finish.

Moreover, the whole G.P.A. system is screwed up. It expects (and forces) people to attempt to be good at everything they do. One hideous grade in ONE or TWO fucking modules out of SIX will cause the overall grade to plummet down. It causes people to spread themselves so thin making them vulnerable to breaking down or snapping. That's why the S/U option should be AFTER the damn bloody exam when results are out. Yeah, people might call it an attempt to "erase" mistakes, but bloody hell, we ain't perfect, and a change in the S/U system might be the only consolation for the acknowledgment of the cruel reality of our own limitations. It's just one of those social structures that perpetuate the idea that we have to be good at everything we do.

Although it doesn't apply to me, I guess the same goes for those trying to get enough points to stay in hall. The more important position you take on in a CCA/club/society, the more points you get. However, at the same time, you get more responsibilities (work), performed at the expense of schoolwork, which simultaneously, you're attempting to be good at.

Sometimes I think the whole motto of "Work hard. Play hard." only applies to naturally smart people. What I mean by naturally smart people, are those with superb memories and are able to grasp ideas/concepts etc. quickly. How about those who need extra time to understand and retain things? Much of that 'extra time' needed will be at the expense of 'playing hard'. I know that everyone can understand anything as long as they try. But the reality is, some people have to try so much harder than others to achieve the same results.

The next 5 weeks or so culminating to the exams will be painful. Not only are there lots of CA there's revision for exams to include.
40 days left. Minus 3 days because I'm going to Penang for a compulsory family holiday Before my exams.

37 days. 37 days. 37 days. I need to get that into my head and start the adrenaline rush.
And PMS is the last thing I need.